On the precipice of attending a wake for a friend and Caballero, I find myself thinking about one of my favorite topics: Death.
Everyone has a different opinion about what happens to us after we die, and I suppose I'm not any different. I feel that there is irrefutable evidence from the paranormal arena that suggests the presence of ghosts and "lost souls" trapped in limbo. I've personally felt at times that I was not alone in a room, knowing full well I was the only person in the house. I believe that my maternal Grandfather is always watching out for me. I suppose, simply, it is because I want to believe he is.
I think as human beings we have a fear of the unknown, a sense of feeling lost, being disconnected, and alone. Like searching for alien life, death is no different in that we want to know we're not going through all of this alone. Why do people have to get old, sick, and ultimately die? I know death is a part of life, a journey we all must take, as Gandalf says, but it can still be a mind fuck of epic proportions.
A human life in length is infinitesimal in the scheme of things as it is, now add cancer, irresponsible drivers, murderers, catastrophic events, heart attacks, etrc. and that life expectancy drops considerably. I have a great Aunt that recently celebrated her 98th birthday. She's never been married, never had children, I'm absolutely certain she has never been with a man, or woman for that matter, and she is well taken care of in an assisted living facility on Staten Island, and she doesn't have to pay a dime to live there. The irony? All she does is complain about everything from the food to the staff to her dining tablemates, and that her feet hurt. She is still sharp as a tack and misses nothing. Boggles my mind.
I've had a thought over the years that might not make sense to anyone, but it makes perfect sense to me:
If we cannot remember being born, how can we remember dying?
PS- RIP Jack Kotran, you will be missed my great friend. I know you're up there with your bottle of yellow Gatorade, spiked with Absolute and a bucket of Tootsie Pops ready to cheer on your Caballeros in 2011. =D